that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually heβll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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