ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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