nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
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