You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize