So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Randomize
