This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
