Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
