Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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