Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Randomize