kristin has been a bad kristin
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
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