It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Randomize
