ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
too bad you live with your parents still
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Randomize
