Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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