I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize