People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
