Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize