I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize