So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
It's just like the Real World with babies
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
