And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
