you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
