It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
All the doctor said was why
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
