I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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