even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Randomize
