what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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