Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Randomize