I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Randomize
