at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
