I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
