my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
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