mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
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