But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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