Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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