plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
