I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
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