Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
