I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
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