part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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