Just mADE A PArabola og urine
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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