Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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