i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
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