Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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