Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Help. Why am I so naked?
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