pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
