Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
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