her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
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