He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize