Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
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