I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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