I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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