Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
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