sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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